“Trust Me, I’m a…” – The Authority Trap
This week on this Monday's Choosing Happy Podcast, Heather V Masters busts one of the trickiest myths in personal growth and entrepreneurship: the idea that “experts,” authority figures, or even well-meaning loved ones know what’s best for us.
With warmth, vulnerability, and her trademark British wit (yes, there’s a bit about the dog’s pension!), Heather shares how taking someone else’s advice once landed her in court—and why, when things go pear-shaped, it’s always you left picking up the pieces.
What’s Inside:
- The problem with outsourcing our decision-making—even to “experts,” officials, or family
- Heather’s honest story about following her father’s advice (and living with the fallout)
- Lessons in discernment, boundaries, and listening to your own gut
- The ultimate truth: we are responsible for our own choices and results
- A gentle, practical challenge to help you trust your instincts this week
- Bonus: Relatable laughs, the chaos of village fêtes, and—of course—the fate of the dog’s pension
Takeaway:
Next time someone tries to steer your ship (no matter their title or relationship), pause. Is this right for you, or just comfortable for them? Remember: you’re the captain. Own your choices—and your results.
- In a world full of advice, remember that your life's path is uniquely yours, not a group project.
- Every so-called expert is just a human navigating their own challenges, so trust your instincts first.
- When advice makes your stomach twist, that's your inner wisdom nudging you to pause and reflect.
- It's perfectly okay to listen to others, but your choices should always be driven by your own heart.
- The choices we make and the results that follow are ours alone, so embrace that responsibility.
- Next time someone tries to steer your ship, ask if their advice fits you or just makes their life easier.
Chapters:
- 00:12 - The Challenge of Trusting Others
- 01:06 - Navigating Advice and Personal Decisions
- 03:34 - The Turning Point: Reclaiming Control
- 04:00 - Lessons on Personal Empowerment
- 05:49 - Taking Control of Your Choices
- 07:12 - Closing Remarks and Next Steps
Let’s Connect:
- Subscribe, rate, and review the show. Every little helps in spreading the word about my podcast.
- Share your own “trust me…” stories or worst advice moments (tag @ChoosingHappyPodcast)
- For more honest real-life reflection, visit www.choosinghappypodcast.com
Resources
- Connect with Heather for transformation work
- New LinkedIn AI newsletter for transformational practitioners
Next Episode
Join us next Monday for another Myth Busting episode where we flip the narrative on some common "truths".
How You Can Support This Independent Podcast:
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Check out the Pattern Breaker Coaching Program: www.choosinghappy.co.uk/pattern-breaker
Want to dive deeper? Drop me an email: heather@heathervmasters.com
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Transcript
Right then, welcome to the Choosing Happy Podcast, where we get real about personal growth, happiness, and frankly, living our life our own way.
Speaker A:Even when the world shouting Trust me, I'm a something or other at us.
Speaker A:The world's positively teeming with folks lining up to say, trust me, I'm a something.
Speaker A:Gurus, government types, thought leaders with jobs, job titles longer than your own, partners who claim to know best, mum on the phone, even the odd bossy boots waving a clipboard.
Speaker A:Blimey.
Speaker A:If I had a pound for every time someone pipes up with advice, I'd have sorted the dog's pension by now.
Speaker A:And maybe my own while I'm at it.
Speaker A:But here's the thing.
Speaker A:The idea that any expert leader or even someone you love knows your path better than you is absolute tosh.
Speaker A:Your life isn't a group project.
Speaker A:You're steering the ship.
Speaker A:Even if the backseat drivers won't stop shouting directions.
Speaker A:Stay tuned to find out how to navigate this and more in today's Choosing Happy Podcast.
Speaker A:Here's where it really hit home for me.
Speaker A:Painfully, if I'm honest.
Speaker A:Years ago, I took advice from my father during a sticky business spot.
Speaker A:I thought, he's older, wiser.
Speaker A:He was a company secretary.
Speaker A:He was an accountant.
Speaker A:He must know best, because I was only young and foolish.
Speaker A:So I followed his advice to the letter.
Speaker A:And what happened?
Speaker A:It landed me square in the middle of a legal case.
Speaker A:I can still remember the panic.
Speaker A:Heart racing, palm sweaty and my stomach doing an Olympic somersault.
Speaker A:Not just the legal mess, which, let's face it, was bad enough, but the stress, the sleepless nights, and the creeping dread every time the postman shoved another letter through my door.
Speaker A:And my reputation, well, the that took a knocking.
Speaker A:And I'm still patching up some of that today.
Speaker A:But here's the gut punch.
Speaker A:When it all went pear shaped, who was left holding the bag?
Speaker A:That's right.
Speaker A:Me.
Speaker A:The Trust Me brigade.
Speaker A:Not even a whiff left.
Speaker A:Vanished like last week's roast beef.
Speaker A:Honestly, I felt less alone at a rained out village fate with only the tombola lady for company.
Speaker A:And that's just one example.
Speaker A:After I got made redundant, booted out with all the other casualties, the floodgates of other people's wisdom swung open.
Speaker A:Family experts, those online coaches promising happiness on a monthly payment plan, even the ever shifting government rules, all telling me how to do it right.
Speaker A:I tried all their formulas, all the foolproof plans, even the posterior eight 2am nonsense.
Speaker A:Each attempt felt like stuffing myself into shoes two sizes too small, pinchy, awkward and guaranteed to give you blisters we didn't even know you could get blisters.
Speaker A:My own instincts buried under a pile of trust me, I'm a guru noise.
Speaker A:Until one soggy evening with nothing but the dogs and a cold cuppa for company, I asked myself, since when did everyone else get to be the boss of me?
Speaker A:And that flicker of let's call it rebellion was like a warm mug of tea after a walk and sideways rain.
Speaker A:Nobody's living your life except you.
Speaker A:So here's a few lessons I learned along the way.
Speaker A:Number one, every expert government official, family member, doctor, or even a clever bit of AI is just another human muddling through.
Speaker A:Titles look shiny, but not one of them comes with a map of your own heart.
Speaker A:Two, if advice rules or shoulds make your stomach twist or your spirit sag, then pause.
Speaker A:That's wisdom knocking.
Speaker A:Trust me or don't.
Speaker A:Question everything and answer only to yourself.
Speaker A:Keep that critical thinking strong.
Speaker A:Number three, it's okay to listen.
Speaker A:It's even good to consider.
Speaker A:But you never have to let anyone else call the shots.
Speaker A:Your boundaries are law.
Speaker A:You're allowed no encourage to say thanks, but I'll captain my own ship from here.
Speaker A:Cheers.
Speaker A:And the ultimate lesson.
Speaker A:At the end of the day, the choices and the results are ours alone.
Speaker A:And that can feel a bit weighty, but it's the honest truth.
Speaker A:We are solely responsible for what we choose and what follows.
Speaker A:And keeping that front of mind isn't just brave, it genuinely changes the choices we make.
Speaker A:When we realize the steering wheels in our hands, we stop handing it over to everyone else.
Speaker A:So let me ask you, have you ever followed someone's trust me advice and ended up wading through the aftermath alone?
Speaker A:You're not the only one, I promise you that.
Speaker A:We've all got a story or two filed under should have trusted my gut.
Speaker A:If this is you, you're in good company.
Speaker A:So here's your challenge for this week.
Speaker A:Practice a spot of low key mutiny.
Speaker A:Next time someone government, partner, mum, or even an AI bless it, tells you how to steer your ship, pause and ask, is this right for me or just convenient for them?
Speaker A:And remember, it's your choice, your result.
Speaker A:If it's not your fit, trust yourself and sail your own way.
Speaker A:Even if it means braving a storm or two.
Speaker A:So if you're nodding along or you've got your own dog's pension to sort out, do me a favour, hit subscribe.
Speaker A:So only you get to decide what shows up in your feed.
Speaker A:Leave a review with the wildest or worst advice you've ever followed.
Speaker A:Let's have a laugh or a collective groan and tag me at choosing HappyPodcast on Socials.
Speaker A:Or pop over to the website choosinghappypodcast.com for more real life chin wags and a good old natter.
Speaker A:And remember, you're the captain, the curator, and the chief mischief maker in your story, dog's pension and all.
Speaker A:Now I'm off to walk that dog and see if anyone else tries to tell me which way to go.
Speaker A:Spoiler.
Speaker A:They'll have to catch me first.
Speaker A:Speak soon.
Speaker A:Thank you so much for taking the time to listen to this week's episode.
Speaker A:If you enjoyed it or think it would be valuable to others, please do share.
Speaker A:And if you really enjoyed it, please leave me a review.
Speaker A:It really helps the podcast.
Speaker A:All of the links are in the show notes, and I look forward to seeing you next week on the Choosing Happy podcast.
Speaker A:Sam.
